Priscilla Kohl

HR for Small Business Achievers

Manager Training Tips: Should Managers Get Buddy-Buddy with Their Teams?

 

Hardly anyone would question the value of leading winning teams to succeed in the workplace. 

How should leaders and managers guide teams to win and to succeed? Should they get buddy-buddy with direct reports? Should they wield a heavy hand and coerce them into submission? I’ve had an extensive corporate career and worked with both types of managers. As usual, extremes tend to have their downsides. 

I recently read a performance specialist’s Insight on www.hrtools.com, and it made me think. He endorsed and described a leadership strategy known as ‘Servant Leadership,’ which is also very well-practiced at my company. He cautions, however, that this practice calls for walking a fine line. The good servant leaders leave their egos at the front door, roll up their sleeves and work side-by-side with their teams. Yet, all the while, they must also set a tone for commanding accountability and having the final word on major decisions. It’s a delicate balancing act. 

After reading this piece, it occurred to me: The best managers I’ve known (those who lead high performing teams) remind me of the best parents I’ve ever known. Both strive to maintain a delicate balance in their respective roles. In fact, I have noticed that effective managers and effective parents share similar attributes that apply to leadership issues; and many attributes can be acquired through continuous training and development, as well as through trial and error. Among them:   

1. Control issues: Striving to gain long-term commitment, not short-term compliance. I find that human beings respond best when they understand the reasoning or the rationale behind controls, mores or even mandates. Long-term commitment is usually a byproduct of consistently well-communicated objectives and plans. As we grow in our understanding and commitment, we also tend to take more initiative and accept responsibility. 
2. Relationship issues: Striving to build consensus by gaining respect, earning trust and building credibility. Playing favorites or getting too buddy-buddy can cause people in authority (who also have great responsibility) to unintentionally take a detour to ‘malfunction junction.’ You know what I mean? That old saying, “Familiarity breeds contempt.” Again, it’s walking that fine line or striking that right tone. Effective servant leaders seem to know when it’s time to be nurturing and flexible, versus knowing when it’s time to exercise a firm and non-negotiating position. A leader’s focus should be more on shaping the collective power of the unit or team, as a whole, instead of building individual friendships. 
3. Functionality issues: Striving to keep operations running smoothly, but also striving to be aware when challenging the status quo might be necessary. Another fine line here, as a leader cannot spend all his/her time either micro-managing or putting out fires. Sometimes, it’s a leader’s responsibility to rise above the fray and recommend ways for doing things differently, even when it means challenging the status quo or higher authorities. And the wise leaders also get it: Measured boldness can often be highly rewarding for everyone. When leaders demonstrate that they are (a) highly competent; and (b) able to influence or affect positive changes, they can also find themselves in a better position to earn subordinates’ respect and trust. In exchange, subordinates become more inclined to willingly and wholeheartedly support their leaders. 

What’s the bottom line? Continuous training and development can be very important for both roles. No one is born knowing all these things.

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